


Only a Matter of Time

by Talinor



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Closure, F/M, Fix-It, Post-Canon, Season 8 Spoilers, epilogue compliant
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-21 17:40:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,377
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17047655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Talinor/pseuds/Talinor
Summary: He'd always dreamed of being a dashing fighter pilot, venturing out amongst the stars with a trail of broken hearts. Of aliens falling for his natural charisma like he was some interstellar Casanova. In a way, he got his wish.It just wasn't quite how he'd imagined.





	Only a Matter of Time

**Author's Note:**

> listen  
> that ending was bullshit  
> but i'm a slut for angsty endings (and fixing them)  
> so i'm definitely going to do more of that, though how close it'll stick to canon.... Depends  
> anyway!! enjoy my 100th fic!!

He'd gotten pretty good at keeping up facades. Sure, he let his family, blood or otherwise, know losing Allura hurt like hell. That all he needed was time to reflect on life and get over it.

But they were only half-truths. Placebo words to cease their worried expressions and pitied glances. They had parts of truth inside, but it was never complete.

Because _he_ didn't feel complete. Since the moment her lips disconnected from his, since she walked off to join the very stars in the sky, it felt like a hole had been torn through his heart. A gaping, hollow hole that oozed emptiness to the rest of his system. It constantly radiated a hurt he'd never known before, and now couldn't remember what life was like without. He knew the hole would never truly close or stop hurting. Time wouldn't heal this wound.

How could it when he'd see the reminder of his pain every day in the mirror, resting just under his eyes?

They were marks of the Chosen. Not because Oriande had thought him worthy, but because _Allura_ had thought him worthy. She had chosen him, and he had chosen her.

And for eleven months, he grappled with that. The fact that he found someone who made him strive to be better, someone who sacrificed pieces of her life time and time again until there was nothing left for her to give. The fact that someone as strong and utterly selfless like that loved him was a miracle in itself.

He should have known it wouldn't last.

He moved to Altea with most of his family and started a farm. He still laughed and joked around with them, but he knew they could see the sadness deep in his eyes. When he'd see the others in Team Voltron, he knew they saw the same. How quiet he was compared to when he lived with them last. How the years had taken from and matured him, in both good and bad ways.

He spent many nights lying awake in bed, gazing out the window at the stars. Everywhere he looked in the night sky, he saw aspects of Allura. The strands of moonlight reminded him of her hair. The stars were her eyes, blazing with a familiar determination. The deep blue sky reminded him of her Lion, blue and beautiful.

The night before Voltron's first yearly meetup, he thought he imagined the trees rustling. He spied a glimpse of a familiar shade of blue metal amongst them. An old but still strong bond poked and prodded at his mind, tugging at it insistently. Urging him silently to find her.

Like a man possessed, he got out of bed. He made sure to be as quick and quiet as he could walking through the dead halls of his home. But with each step he took, the hole in his heart got infinitesimally smaller. His excitement increased with it.

By the time he got outside, he was full-on running. He was barefoot on harsh ground in the middle of a skin-chilling night, but he couldn't find it in himself to care. The pain he felt was child's play compared to the past year.

The pull got stronger the closer he got. The empty feeling in him took a backseat for once and let him feel like more than a devastated ruin trying to regrow. The months melted off of him as he drew closer to his former Lion. Closer to _her_ former Lion. He didn't dare question why she was here, or why she picked right now to want to meet with him. He deserved a breath of the recklessness of pre-war youth.

Blue anticipated him. Her eyes flashed brighter as soon as they saw each other, and a welcoming purr sounded in his mind. He didn't hesitate; he just kept running towards her. She bent down, opening her metallic maw and extending her catwalk just in time for him not to break his stride. He only slowed once he was in her halls.

A blinding wave of nostalgia poured over him as soon as he started observing his surroundings. After all this time, Blue still looked the same. Her walls hadn't changed a bit from when he took his first steps in them. Only this time, he didn't need her guiding lights towards the cockpit. He knew exactly where to go. He just needed a moment to walk and reflect on the whirlwind his life with her had been.

"I never would have met her if not for you," he thought aloud. "I never thanked you for that, girl." His only answer was another purr. One that radiated knowledge, like she had already known how grateful he was... but it was still nice to hear him say. Then she went quiet with an all-too-familiar sadness. He reached out his hand consolingly along her walls. "I know. I miss her too."

He got the same acknowledgment, just a bit quieter this time. 

He understood it far too well. Their adventures had taken much. It had nearly taken their lives-- and took an uncountable number of others they'd known-- many times. Too many times to not leave a sizable mark. Too many times to stay the same person you were before the mess your life became. Too many times to leave you at the end of it all wanting for anything but peace and quiet for once.

He'd always dreamed of being a dashing fighter pilot, venturing out amongst the stars with a trail of broken hearts. Of aliens falling for his natural charisma like he was some interstellar Casanova. In a way, he got his wish.

It just wasn't quite how he'd imagined. 

Love and War tangled themselves up in his life, digging their claws into his skin and twisting their buried daggers. They'd circled around him in a twisted yet all-encompassing dance that was both thrilling and chilling. They were as mutual in his life as beauty and pain. It'd been a deadly dancefloor and a beautiful battlefield at the same time.

And now whatever twisted being in charge of his life was done with him. Wrung him out and left him up to dry as a husk of the naïve kid he used to be.

It took him a moment to realize he was now standing in the cockpit. He moved to sit in the pilot's chair and sat back. Even after all this time, he could still smell traces of juniberry all around him. He sighed and closed his eyes.

It was easy for him to see Allura in the hollows of his eyelids. How the room seemed to brighten a bit whenever she smiled. How she flowed like water and radiated the power of a whirling hurricane when she fought. How her voice could be hard and authoritative in public, then unbelievably soft and vulnerable in private. How her laughter was a song he never wanted to end. How her lips felt against his.

Blue prodding for him to relax made him realize how close he'd been to crying. He let out a stuttering sigh and let the tears fall silently down his cheeks. The knots in his body temporarily loosened their grip. Allura faded from his imagination for now. The void grew empty once more.

When Blue wanted him to open his eyes again, he obeyed.

Yet he wasn't sitting in her cockpit anymore. He was standing in her mindscape, radiating an aura of weathered blue. Where his heart was, a fist-sized circle lay on his chest. It was mainly faded red with a small bright core of pink. Despite himself, he smiled at the notion. It was a bittersweet smile, but it was his first genuine smile in too long.

The smile gained more sweetness as soon as he saw the only other presence around him.

Once again, he didn't think. He just ran towards her with everything in him. 

He didn't even bother to notice how his aura glowed with each step he took. He didn't care how far away she seemed. He'd cross every reality in existence for her without a second thought. This was nothing, especially with how his mood had greatly improved in an instant.

When she noticed him moving towards her, her faded form brightened to match his own. She joined him in closing the distance between him with the wind at their heels. They were two shooting stars in an endless horizon eager to collide.

A bright flash illuminated the mindscape as soon as they finally touched. They automatically went into a mutual embrace, holding each other as if they'd be torn apart if they didn't. In a flash, he re-remembered how she felt against him. How her hair felt against his cheek. How she still carried her scent in the astral mindscape. He never wanted this moment to end. He could have died happy here, wrapped up in the only arms that made him feel safe and secure.

But he knew it wouldn't last forever. When she started to move away, he reluctantly let her. Thankfully she didn't go very far.

Her crystal blue eyes were just as breathtakingly beautiful as they were when he lost her. They shone now with starlight sadness as they met his once again.

"Lance," she said, raising one hand to caress his cheek. "Words can't begin to describe how much I've missed you."

He unconsciously leaned into the touch and closed his eyes to allow himself a moment to savor it. He didn't keep them closed for long; he needed to see her face again. Remind himself that this was real, instead of a torturous delusion. "Trust me," he responded with all the warmth coursing through him. "The feeling's more than mutual, Allura."

She gave him a small smile, but the sadness still gleamed her eyes. "...But what are you doing here? Aren't you enjoying the life you earned?"

With a question like that, he had to be honest with her. "No," he leaned forward until his forehead rested against hers. "Because you're not there with me."

Her hand moved to embrace his. The spaces between his fingers fit hers perfectly. "I told you, love." Her aura shimmered, threatening to flicker. "I will always be with you." Her eyes met his solemnly. "But don't get so wrapped up in me that you forget yourself. You deserve to be happy, even without me."

"How can I?" He asked, trying and failing not to betray the desperation in his voice. "Nearly everywhere I look, I see you. But I know that..."

"...That this is the closest thing you've gotten to me." Allura finished for him. "I know. But even I am just a collection of memories given form. I am not the Allura you fell in love with."

"I know," Tears threatened to choke him. "But what am I supposed to do without you?"

"You're a tortured soul, my dear," she told him. "The only thing you can do is realize the only one torturing you is yourself." Scintillating stars started to float from her form and fade into the mindscape. "I'm not saying you forget her, or find someone new if your heart's not ready, but-"

"Allura," he interrupted her with the question that had grappled his mind and refused to let go. "What if I'm never ready? What if... you were my only shot at love?"

Her expression softened. "Love is all around you," she reminded him. "But I know that's not the love you mean. But remember, Lance, you don't need to be in a romantic relationship to have that kind of love."

"What do you mean by that?"

"I mean sate your aching heart with a different love if you need to," she said. "Or, when you feel ready to, move on from Allura. As I said before, she is all around you. You may feel it, but you will never be alone." More and more of her was starting to fade. "Who knows? You may see a spark of her where you wouldn't expect. If you wish to, look for it." Her hands disintegrated into celestial blue stardust. "But take care of yourself first. You'll see her again." She was quickly fading now, despite his efforts to hold on to her. "It's only a matter of time. Just make sure to enjoy it."

Her lips graced his once more, and then they were gone.

Lance woke up from his astral wonderland with puffy eyes and the same debilitating emptiness, but something new to think about.

The next evening, he watched Blue take off with the other Lions. He couldn't help but smile. The last lesson she needed to teach him was over. Their journeys together were legendary and unforgettable, but this was where their road had to part.

"Thank you," he muttered up to her. "Say hi to her for me."

The only response he got was an acknowledging purr in his mind before the bond finally disconnected.

With Allura's words constant in his mind, Lance reached out for the love he needed. 

He found it in his family, his friends... and a little Altean orphan girl named Angelique. Her amber eyes blazed with a familiar determination. Her soil-colored hair was shorter, but just as poofy and beautiful.

From the moment he saw her, he knew what Allura meant. She was practically a constellation of sparks from her. He learned the many differences as he got to know her, from her difficulties with other children and how she went days without saying a single word. But he trudged through the bumpy roads with love and patience, for he knew it was worth it. _She_ was worth it.

_"Papá," she asked quietly, looking up at the statue of Allura with awe. "Is that Mamá?" Her arms around his neck tightened until her cheek smushed against his._

He never thought he'd be a father. He loved kids to no end, but the thought of taking care of any full-time used to make him sick.

Now he wouldn't give it up for anything in the universe.

_He couldn't help but chuckle at that, staring at her wonder fondly. "Not exactly," he admitted. "But I like to think she would have been if she could. Your middle name was actually based on hers, cariña."_

_"Didja' love her a lot?" He nodded, and could see her mull that over for a second. "Okay," she said, finally meeting his eyes. "Can we go get ice cream now, papá?"_

_"Of course, princess."_

Over the years, he saw her learn and grow into a fine young woman. She studied harder than he'd seen anyone else do; she trained and fought like hell to prove she could accomplish anything people said she couldn't. She had a fire in her belly to show that even though she was on the spectrum, it wasn't some kind of hindrance of her abilities.

He nurtured her and helped her through her challenges wherever he could. Eventually, it came to an end. She was a Garrison officer; he knew she'd eventually take off out of the nest.

When she did, she _soared_ well above the atmosphere. On the Atlas, of all ships. She'd be gone for months or even years at a time, but she'd always come back with plenty of stories to tell him. When she called him with a captain's uniform and happy tears in her eyes, he knew his little Angel had taken flight. She'd made history as the first Altean captain of the Atlas, but he doubted history had heard the last of her.

Years went by. On each one, on the same day, team Voltron would gather around a table and catch up. Marriages were made (and in a few cases, broke off) and varying adventures were told. 

Shiro grew tired of the quiet life and found his happiness amongst the stars he'd fought to save. Curtis was supportive, but the long distance eventually got to them. After 5 years of marriage, they had as friendly a divorce as one could get.

Keith stuck by his side through it, as he always stuck by Shiro. He welcomed his old friend into the Blade with open arms. It took another year for Lance to see what was developing between them. It took them three.

Hunk had become a cook of legend, and gained poolfuls of money from his galaxy-wide tour. He kept very little of it for himself. Instead, he gave it to reconstruction efforts and research projects for the future. He settled down on Earth with his family... and Shay.

Pidge stayed with their family on the Atlas for most of the time. They seemed to always have a different project-- a new target for their endless curiosity-- every time he talked to them. Whether it was advancements in robotics or curing cancer, they never stopped tackling new challenges. With their family at their side, they were unstoppable.

Coran was a fair and just Altean councilor for the Coalition. However, he didn't stay in the job long. He stepped down, naming Romelle as his successor, and retired to teach children his unconventional wisdom. When he passed, he was buried in the field next to Allura's statue and given a plaque on the base of it. It read, "Coran Hieronymus Wimbleton Smythe: A Truly Gorgeous Man."

And Lance? Despite his loved ones' well-meaning protests, he never got back into the dating game. But he did move on, in a way. Time didn't heal his wounds, but it lessened their sting. He might not have had the love of his life by his side, but the love he did have was more than enough to fill the hollow hole in his heart.

Decades passed. Angelique met a nice Galra girl to travel the stars with. His family grew bigger as he transitioned from 'Uncle Lance' to 'Great Uncle Lance', from 'Papá' to 'Abuelo'. He got an opportunity he never thought he'd have in his Voltron days: he grew old and gray.

When he was young, he thought he'd go out valiantly. He wanted to go out with a bang and make a difference in the Universe.

But as he lay in his bed with labored breath, looking at the faces of those who'd loved him dearly at his bedside, he knew he'd accomplished his goal. Just not in the way he expected. He'd made his mark on the Universe. Now it was time for him to leave it behind for good.

The concept of death used to terrify him. Mainly the aspect that he might die with regrets, things he'd wish he'd done. 

That wasn't the case.

He sighed and closed his eyes one last time.

When he opened them, he was surrounded by blinding white. Only one figure was waiting for him in the distance.

The decades melted off his spirit in an instant when he saw her smile. Just like that fated night in Blue, they sprinted towards each other like no time had passed at all. Only this time, he knew it was truly her. She was as breathtakingly beautiful as the day he lost her.

They skipped the initial embrace and went right for the kiss. Judging from the tinge of a salty taste, he knew she was crying too. In that moment, everything melted away. Nothing mattered but right here and right now. If this was all the afterlife was, he was more than happy with it.

She smiled as their lips parted, but didn't stay far. "You know," she said. "You lived... _a lot_ longer than I thought you would." There was a chuckle in her voice, but tears still shone in her vibrant blue eyes. Her marks glowed faintly. He could only guess his were doing the same.

"I know," he admitted and looked at her hopefully. "Was I worth the wait?"

"Of course," she didn't hesitate to answer. "But I admit I'm glad the wait wasn't longer." A hand drifted down to connect with his. "Come on," she started forward. "The others will want to see you. In the meantime, tell me _everything_ I've missed."

He complied as he followed her into the rest of their existences.

**Author's Note:**

> comments are appreciated!! please Cry with me  
> tumblr: squishy--squish  
> hmu if you want my discord


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